Selasa, September 21, 2010

happy day on a birthday (emotion edition)

I started work today after a long week of Hari Raya holiday. Office was fun as usual with stuff and things happening around. Some are pumped up for work and more work after the break but more are eager to let the mood of Hari Raya still looming on them. Me... was just plain me. Work and play. Play and work. But that was not the hightlight of the day.

The highlight of the day was after work. It is because today was my sister's birthday and I got to be with the whole family to celebrate it. A tradition, I supposed. One family being celebrated at home with big feasts or a cake to share at least. And so there I was, after work. At home on time, precisely where everyone in the family should be. Mama, Babah, Nana, Faris, Abang Ngah, Ayu, OG, Jiji, Rayyan, Miqa and of course his mother and the one being celebrated - kakak. We had KFC tonight. We had great fun eating KFC. Happiness is in the air. Smile and laughter can be heard every where. Rayyan and Miqa was again at the center of attraction. Mama was laughing out loud and babah was happy with their commotion. My sisters and brothers can't have enough of them. As I was lurking behind those smiles and laughter, I suddenly had this emotional breakdown. I mean literally and metaphorically.

Emotionally breaking down for a split second.

I can see how happy having a family is. Both my nephews had grown up so fast now. Rayyan is now 1 and half years old and Miqa being 6 months. Both adorably cute and astonishingly amazing. Deep inside, without anyone noticing or knowing in that exact room, I am deepy touched. I mean, yeah. That feeling of having kids and a wife and bringing up a family. How proud and glad it is to make Mama and Babah happy. Abang Ngah has done that with Ayu. Kakak has done it with Jiji.

And me? Where is my stand in this? Whats my role? Do I make them as happy as them both? How is it that differ them from me?

Now. Isn't that a thought to ponder and wonder with.


-s- berkata...

go on. get married. dont be too cerewet. money is everywhere. happiness in life is forever.

faizalmukhtar berkata...


for me, money is not the problem. Its not even 'a' problem.

Tanpa Nama berkata...

calon kan dah ada..

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