Khamis, Oktober 27, 2005


Day after day of unrelenting rain. And I've been sitting here in my fortress of solitude, relieved that this must be somekind of precursor sign from the Almighty.

Getting a lot of people asking me if the “bulan puasa” have impacts on my past and current life. I answered this extensively elsewhen and elsewhere and am basically reproducing it here so I don't have to keep saying it. And I stress that this is merely my thoughts on the matter, not anyones.

The Answer : Yes ( Sebenarnya aku sayang giler nak tinggalkan Ramadhan. Banyak sangat citer yang aku simpan dan dapat setiap kali bulan suci penuh keramat ni datang. Tanya ler sapa ajer yang tahu pasal aku dan 30 hari penuh pengisian yang datang hanya setahun sekali )

I'm posting an entry from further down memory lane because we're coming up on the deadline for Syawal 2005. So what do you have to do when all this nostalgia kicks-in? It’s not simple, really. Suggest a figure like myself to be a ghost from the past and trying to live for the future. Making up for old sins.

Never fear.

I tell you this in the strictest confidence. In fact, this is so secret that ONLY YOU readers of this blog; are witnessing. Yes, you. Everyone else is seeing the timid-superficial side of me. In fact, if you're seeing me everyday right now, it'd be best if you just shut yourself from me until after Hari raya. Unfortunately, this doesn’t make any sense for those who don’t know me at all.

Know what I think? I think if people are happy with me making them happy and I say it’s all fine... God bless them. There are so many people in my life who are laboring at things that they despise about me. Seriously, where on earth does ANYONE get off slip-slapping people who are living out their dreams, the dreams of writing the stuff I grew up with? And by the way, having the sheer nerve and determination to brave the staggering odds of breaking in to be able to achieve those goals deserves far more than a dismissive "critiques". It deserves a "well done you" and "welcome to the club" and "stick with it". It doesn't deserve snottiness and arrogance and the snip-snapping bullying of the jock mentality which these people display with such vigorousity.

And how about the notion that the people who achieved their goal of crafting new directions and ideas for the Malaysian comic industry achieved their current station in life without stepping over the bodies of friends in order to do so? Go figure it out, people.

Producing a brand new magazine with some superhero tales is what makes me entirely happy ( look for more scribe from me in 2006 ). Producing my own concept and stylized stories is what makes other people happy. One is not intrinsically more cowardly than the other. Frankly, it's as if they had a great way to end this unruly episode and had to stall for time until they got to it. Still, it's not as if I'm going to stop watching and observing at this point. But not the strongest attempt by a longshot. I'm sorry, but I simply cannot accept the idea that some people are crashing up against each other. That's pretty much what I'm here for, and certainly the fact that it's been extremely busy for me, this is far better than just sitting here with nothing to say .

Just one opinion to share with. Hope to see you all here for my Hari Raya testimonial next time.



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